Sunday, May 03, 2015

Questions asked during Q & A sessions

UPDATE: I just noticed that Anthony Le Donne has linked to the same post. He posted it first.

From The Toast.
1. “I’d like you to know that I’m particularly smart. Here are some subjects I consider myself to be very smart about. There is no question.” 
2. “Can you explain why I didn’t understand this presentation?” 
3. “This question has two parts, neither of which have anything to do with the other or the subject at hand. Also, this question has four parts.” 
4. “Can you possibly speak to an area that is outside of your expertise but is secretly in mine, so that when you can’t answer it, I can try to hang onto the microphone and answer it for you?” 
5. “I’ve written a book. Why hasn’t anyone published it? I will not tell you what this book is about. I have already tried all of the suggestions you are about to offer me, so don’t even try it.” 
6. “I have some opinions about other ethnic groups that I would like to take this opportunity to share.” 
7. “Why aren’t I very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very famous and successful?” 
8. “Hi, I’d like to complain about as many things as possible before the moderator realizes I’m not building up to a question of any kind and cuts me off.” 
9. “I’m deeply unpleasant, and have run out of friends and family members who are willing to put up with my opinions.” 
10. “I used to like your work, but I don’t now. Have you considered doing the things I like again?” 
11. “Hi, I have a personal anecdote that I believe completely disproves the central thesis of your research?”

2 comments:

Daniel Garland Jr said...

Sounds like some of Kincaid's questions! ;-)

John Bergsma said...

Amazing! I didn't know someone was transcribing the last several Q&A's I've done.